


on your mind

by struberry



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Break Up, Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-23
Updated: 2018-02-23
Packaged: 2019-03-23 02:25:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13777698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/struberry/pseuds/struberry
Summary: Mingyu doesn’t remember how they had gotten into the argument.





	on your mind

“Well if you’re this unhappy, let’s just break up!”

Minghao’s eyes become glassy too quickly and Mingyu’s widen too slowly.

Panic bubbles beneath Mingyu’s skin as he chews what he's said. “No, Minghao. I didn’t mean that,” his voice is quiet and dwindles away pathetically.

Minghao rubs at his eyes and Mingyu aches because _he_ should have been the one to do that.

“Its fine,” Minghao’s face is sour despite his wet cheeks. “You did.”

_You did._

Mingyu doesn’t chase Minghao when he stomps over to their bedroom and slams the door shut behind him.   

 

___ 

 

“Isn’t Minghao too quiet lately?” Soonyoung says, laptop resting on his knees, screen open to a paused video Chan and he were watching.

“Is he? He was practising late yesterday,” Jeonghan’s face is pressed into one of the big grey pillows Seungkwan had bought last month. “And the day before that.”

A pang of _something_ hits his heart. _Of course_ , Minghao would be practising. _Of course,_ Minghao would be overworking. He always ran himself into the dirt when something was bothering him.

Chan wanders in balancing a plate full of snacks and sets it on the table before settling back into Soonyoung’s side. Jeonghan slides the plate towards himself and says, “Mingyu, will you go and check on Minghao? We can’t afford for him to be overworking himself.”

Mingyu swears his blood runs still but he answers quickly, if not quietly. “Okay, hyung.”

He slips his coat on and heads in the direction of the studio but he doesn’t go there. He can’t. Plucking his phone out of his pocket, he scrolls to Minghao’s name.

[Mingyu]:

(10:09PM) _Where are you?_

Fingers hovering over the send button, he worries his lips between his teeth and thinks. _Overworking, overworking, overworking._ It’s his fault and it hurts. His next breath is choppy and his palms are clammy but he presses send anyway.

He waits for Minghao’s text. He walks up the street, and then back down it. He ducks into a convenience store to buy a drink for Minghao in case Mingyu is lucky enough for him to tell him to come and meet him.

His phone buzzes in his pocket and he nearly drops the plastic bag when he scrambles for it.

[Minghao]:

(10:21 PM) _practising, at the studio. don’t come and find me._

And Mingyu doesn’t.

He tries to slip back into the dorm unnoticed but Jeonghan catches him when he kicks his shoes off in the doorway. He reassures him that Minghao is fine and that he’d come back soon, but Jeonghan turns his nose up and looks at him suspiciously.

He places the drink by Minghao’s bed and crawls into his own.

 

___

 

Minghao slithers into their shared room way past midnight.

Mingyu wants Minghao to slide in behind him; he wants him to kiss his shoulder until he gives in and turns around to scoop him up in his arms. He wants him to lean up and peck his lips, softly. Like every night. As _usual._

He doesn’t.

Mingyu hears him collapse onto the bed at the other side of the room. He rolls over, after confirming that Minghao was facing the other way, and checks his phone.

 _3:23 AM._ Mingyu yearns to brush his knuckles over Minghao’s warm cheek, to see his small smile. Staring at the wall, his eyes are dry. His heart clenches and contracts, knowing that he can’t be with Minghao. He _aches._

Something clambers up his throat, heavy and suffocating.

 

___

 

Mingyu doesn’t remember how they had gotten into the argument but he knows he wishes it hadn’t gotten _there._ They fought regularly, and it was normal. Jeonghan had always said it was a part of their relationship, and besides, Minghao was endearing when he was angry.

“These spats are going to cause trouble for you,” Seungcheol had said one day, but Mingyu had ignored him because Minghao was happily sitting in his lap after winning an argument over who got the last piece of candy left from Halloween.

“It’s love,” Mingyu remembers replying, _stupidly, foolishly, in love._ Minghao had giggled giddily and bubbling in his lap and had playfully swatted Mingyu’s shoulder for embarrassing him.

That was when they had first started dating, two years ago. When they knew they wanted to be together but didn’t know what to do about it. When they knew they just needed to _make something work._

Mingyu wishes that Minghao still wanted to make this work.

 

___

 

Four days later, Mingyu walks into the dorm and finds Minghao curled into Jeonghan’s arms with dried tear tracks down his cheeks.

Minghao is asleep but Jeonghan stares at him as if saying _‘explain’._ His eyes flicker over Minghao, and his fractured heart twinges, like the rifts were beginning to grow further apart. Even if his eyes are closed, Mingyu can see the exhaustion. The patches of darkness beneath his eyes, the way he grips Jeonghan’s hand, looking for comfort. They give it all away.

Ignoring Jeonghan’s glare (which he finds is difficult to do, because it means ignoring Minghao as well), he slips into the bedroom.

 

___

“You need to talk.”

That was easy for Wonwoo to say because he has Junhui in his arms, who loves him.

“It’s not that simple,” Mingyu snaps, and Wonwoo curls his hand tighter around Junhui’s waist as if someone was going to take him away. An uncomfortable flush shoots through Mingyu’s body, from both the anger and the longing.

“Well, it’s your fault that Mi—“

Junhui reaches up, placing a hand on Wonwoo’s chest, his eyes sad and shimmering. “Enough, Wonwoo,” Junhui removes his hand and moves it to link their fingers together, causing Wonwoo to huff and squeeze them, caressing his thumb over the back of Junhui’s.

Junhui looks to him, and all it takes is one pitiful gaze for Mingyu to come crashing down.

“It’s just so hard,” Mingyu’s voice cracks, and his muscles quiver, but Junhui breaks free of Wonwoo’s grasp and welcomes Mingyu into his arms. Balling his fist into Junhui’s shirt, he sobs louder than he’s ever heard his own voice, harder than he’s ever felt his own body shake. But Junhui’s takes it all, picking up the small, sharp pieces of his heart and mending them together. Haphazardly, but still together. He feels guilty at the fact he’s being held so dearly by Junhui, when he’s the one who hurt Minghao. It’s his fault that Minghao doesn’t love him anymore, yet he’s the one being comforted. The thought makes him whimper more, burying his head more forcefully into Junhui’s neck.

Junhui’s hand skims down his back, rubbing gently and consolingly before he pries Mingyu away from his chest. Rubbing his eyes, Mingyu tries to hide the redness, but Junhui cradles them, bringing them down to his lap. Wonwoo reaches over, brushing Mingyu’s sweaty bangs away from his eyes. He takes his hand, squeezing hard like he had done to Junhui and Mingyu sees the hidden guilt in his eyes, so Mingyu squeezes back, just as tight.

His attention is brought to Junhui when the older lays his hand over Mingyu’s cheek, patting it affectionately, and his eyes fond. “Stop crying, Mingyu. You’re going to make your eyes sore," Giggling, he takes Mingyu’s free hand in his. Both of his hands are warm with love, and Mingyu’s eyes brim with tears again, but they don’t fall.

“I’ll talk to Minghao, “Junhui reassures. Mingyu chews his lip gently, eyes unsure. “He’s upset, Mingyu. He only needs some confidence. He still loves you.”

Junhui’s smile is contagious, and Mingyu feels his mouth tug. The first smile in two weeks.

 

___

By now, Mingyu is used to lying awake for two hours after settling down, waiting for the door to wake him. He wishes he could talk Minghao out of these destructive habits, but he can’t. He sees Minghao not eating, he sees Minghao overworking himself into the small hours of the morning, and he sees the exhaustion in his bones when he stumbles into the room. The most Mingyu can do is prepare some food for him every night, and leave it beside his bed. It’s always untouched in the morning. 

Mingyu is used to all this.

What he’s not used to is a shift in this routine.

“Mingyu.”

Hearing Minghao’s voice makes his heart tremble. His breath catches in his throat, and Mingyu stares, right into Minghao’s wide and honest eyes. When Minghao had come into the room to grab something, Mingyu had expected him to leave, as he always does. But Minghao is speaking. To him.

“Yeah?” his voice betrays him, hoarse and breathy, but he doesn’t notice. There are a few moments of silence, where Mingyu’s swears his heart is still in his chest, the trembles gone.

“I miss you.”

Minghao’s voice rests in the air, Mingyu’s voice caught in his throat.

It’s Minghao who finds Mingyu first and he has barely any time to process the situation before he’s squashed into Minghao’s arms. Lush, damp lips are pressed against Mingyu’s collarbone, shoulders quivering underneath Mingyu’s hand. _It’s too much_. For Minghao’s head to be tucked underneath his chin. For Mingyu to thread his hands through his hair, and to pull him closer. His heart remembers how long he’s been deprived, and it bursts. Clutching at the back of Mingyu’s shirt, Minghao presses himself close, and the warmth oozes from his body and into Mingyu’s, filling him to the brim so that it threatens to spill out.

When Mingyu finally coaxes Minghao from his chest, his eyes are tired and lidded in contentment. He stares; unsure whether he’s allowed to touch anymore, whether or not that’s something Minghao needs anymore. Minghao’s smile is so small and tentative. It makes him seem far away, distant. Even though he’s hesitant, he reaches out, caressing Minghao’s jaw and Minghao responds right away, rubbing circles into Mingyu’s waist.

Slowly bringing their foreheads together, they hold their breath and if they’re going under water when they look into each other’s eyes. Mingyu’s eyes flicker around Minghao’s face because they haven't for so long. It’s all the same. The same pretty eyes, the same freckles and moles in the same places, the same _Minghao._ But there’s tiredness in his face, lines that hadn’t been there before, and Mingyu blames himself.

But Minghao is here now, in his arms, and he’s sure they can fix it.

His hand slides to the back of Minghao’s neck and in a few moments, Minghao’s lips are on his. It’s soft, and languid, but the way Minghao’s fingertips bury themselves into Mingyu’s waist is urgent, anxious to be closer. They build a tender pace, caressing, touching and sighing, before they’re parting. There’s silence, but Mingyu can’t hold himself back anymore. So he presses his lips to the corner of Minghao’s mouth, which draws out a breathy giggle and Mingyu laughs as well, elated. His lips travel further, up to Minghao’s cheek. He peppers kisses underneath his eyes and the bridge of his nose, Minghao squirming and screwing his eyes shut when Mingyu presses a light to peck to each of his eyelids.

When they break apart, Minghao’s eyes are wet. Mingyu buries his face in his hair, breathing him in. “I missed you so much,” He whispers, voice strained. Minghao sniffles and Mingyu pulls back to brush away the tear that rolls down Minghao’s cheek.

They both smile, albeit a little tired and fractured, but they’ll get there.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks so much for reading ♡


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